Say goodbye to the ‘tiger mom’. Welcome to the school of jellyfish parenting

I feel this. In China too, so many of the students in my class have countless after school lessons/clubs/activities.

I read it in Alfie Kohn’s Unconditional Parenting too, which I really need to get around to finishing.

“Few parents have the courage and independence to care more for their children’s happiness than for their success.”2 In extreme cases, the “press for success” can reach a fever pitch, such that the child’s present is essentially mortgaged to the future. Activities that might bring meaning or enjoyment are sacrificed in a ceaseless effort to prepare for Harvard (I’ve come to refer to this process as “Preparation H”). The bottom line is never far from the minds of such parents, who weigh every decision about what their children do in school, or even after school, against the yardstick of how it might contribute to future glories. They are not raising children so much as living résumés, and by the time high school arrives, the kids have learned to sign up for activities strictly to impress college admissions committees, ignoring (or, eventually, losing sight of) what they personally find interesting in the here-and-now.

Since, L and I quite happily didn’t drink in August I’ve realised that sometimes, certain drinks completely mess with my sleep. Which is not on as sleep is something I valuely highly, even at the cost of getting time to myself. That said, sometimes just one is nice.

Looking at old photos of the kids. I have two thoughts…

  1. They’ve grown so much.
  2. I still wear that.

Your Kids Are Not Keeping Score - The Daily Dad

Really think about it. What’s the smallest number of hours you could work per week and keep your boss happy?

Funny this came up because we had a conversation at work and a colleague told me they felt bored. After a moment, I realized that I don’t ever feel bored. There’s always more I feel like I should be doing. That if I dared to feel bored it was because I wasn’t working hard enough or doing my job properly.

Mosquitos didn’t wake me up, but they kept me awake.

I remember when I was at university cough years ago and mp3 players were just becoming more common. I had one that had a SCREEN and was tiny. Now, we all use our phones of course. I still miss my iPod I think, though I do like the convenience of streaming.
With that said, I wish I could get my daughter a streaming music device for her to just listen to music, ideally with her Bluetooth headphones. Am looking at an old iPod touch maybe.

Explaining how to make a roux to the boy

The Enigma of the Eel: The Elusive Science of Earth’s Most Mysterious Creature – The Marginalian

And now I want to read a book about eels.

10 Reasons Forrest Gump is American Royalty

Enjoyed this talk about the the book and see, and feel, a lot of myself at the moment in it. Byung-Chul Han, The Burnout Society - YouTube

Wordle 448 4/6


Took a while but got there, aim high innit.


Chengdu, city of 21m, has Covid lockdown extended indefinitely - China - The Guardian

Sitting at my desk at 7am feels both better than being grumpy at home but also, overall, worse.

Now is now, it can never be anything else wrote Laura Ingalls Wilder. It’s all we have. We should never wish a minute of it away. Not even when we’re tired, when we’re excited about what’s next, when we’re frustrated with how things are going. We never get this moment back. When you find yourself rushing, remind yourself, as we’ve said, where you are rushing towards. And remember that someday you would do anything to get back here to this very thing you are wishing away.

Don’t Wish Away A Minute Of It - The Daily Dad

You need to honor work by not working. You need to not be all about business.

Don’t Be Always Working

Some things

  • Since the kids started school they are both falling asleep so much faster. Bedtime is still stressful, but less so and I am grateful for that. However, they rise, refreshed and raring to go at 6am.
  • We had an earthquake yesterday, but I didn’t feel it, I never do. Colleagues inside did though. We were reasonably far from it.
  • The whole school is being COVID tested today, so story-mapping Where The Wild Things Are by Maurice Sendak will likely be pushed to tomorrow. Did you know that book is 60 years old next year?
  • Still settling into working with new people and students and still feeling unsettled by it. Forever finding things to worry about. Forever feeling not good enough.
  • Which ties nicely into just feeling overwhelmed at the moment because work and home and being forever ‘on’. Well at least between 6am and 8pm. Have been going to bed before 9:30pm, which I know is good for me but it’s a battle mentally even if physically I fall asleep within seconds. Feeling like I need more time. Ain’t never enough time.

Wordle 443 4/6


Elise was lucky enough to do this yesterday! 🪂

Wordle 441 4/6



What kids actually want is you. What kids actually need is Dad. As Dear Abby quite brilliantly put it in a column back in the 1950s, “If you want your children to turn out well, spend twice as much time with them, and half as much money.”

The Daily Dad

Hasn’t rained in weeks. First day of school, it’s tipping it down.

Wordle 436 2/6



Working up to a G-Shock!

I know I should read more but struggling to get into the right headspace to do so. Feel like I’m only capable of browsing.