the examined family, Courtney Martin: ‘Hard conversations don’t fix hard things.’

That was something the comedian Hasan Minhaj told me his father told him to guide him in a conflict. Sometimes, it’s important you’re right and you stand up for yourself, and you take the consequences. Other times, it’s more important to be together, and you figure out which differences or conflicts you can let slide for the sake of a relationship. We have to do both at different times, sometimes in the same conversation!